Page 38 ...It should be noted, even though it seems obvious, that the unpleasant feeling experienced in a new situation is the source of our fear of trying again. It is this physically negative experience that we seek to avoid repeating. We can try to reason until eternity but the fact remains that we fear repetition of this unpleasant experience and in every similar situation, the same symptoms appear. It is as if our fears are built into our body. Moreover, once our fear has been overcome, we can calmly think about the situations concerned, talk about them, relive them, without feeling anything: this is the key.
The last sentence demonstrates the importance of understanding the origin or source of certain fears, which are often incorrectly considered as ‘transmitted’.
A child who has been burned will be afraid of the repetition of the burning sensation. It has experienced it already. But a child that has seen its parents thrown into panic by a fire will also be afraid of fire without having actually experience being burned. Later on, when close to fire, the fear that will surge up will not be that of being burned, which it doesn’t know, but unconsciously that of the displeasure of seeing his parents’ excessive panic. Fire is certainly a key element in the fear but it is the feeling produced by the reaction when adult which is the real source of unease. It is therefore wrong to speak of ‘transmission’ but more correctly ‘confusion’. Moreover, with this type of fear people often admit to being afraid of fire, storms, mice or a spider only in the presence of others. When confronted alone with such situations, their first reaction is to look around to see if anyone else is present. If they think they are alone, there is no problem. The presence of fire, a storm, a mouse or a spider is dealt with normally and often even with curiosity or attraction.